18th of April, 2007

surprisingly,yesterday wasnt fun.It sucked.and oh boy,I was totally horrified by the sum of anger that built up in me towards him. At first I wanted to keep all the anger within but I just can't help it I just let it all out.I was angry when he doesnt reply my msgES.I was angry when he didnt ask me abt my day.I was angry when he didnt really call or text me.I was angry when I called him and he said he's out with his friend.I was angry when he asked if i am angry or not.

like, D-U-H!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Does it EVEN ticks in his brain??

Argh GUYS,MEN,THE SUPERIOR KIND OF HUMAN BEING. they just cant get it right in their head! It is all about them,them and them.

"I just want to spend time with my friends."
"I am tired after match."
"I was doing assignment."

THAT'S BULL! I can even reply msges when i am showering,IF the HP is waterproof! When i take a shit,when im in discussion,when im in class,when im driving,when im in church u dammit!

Guys are just so plain fcking ignorant!

So yea,I am tired of making excuses for him. So i told him i will give him 2 days by himself and I wont contact him within that time.And I will msg him back IF I REMEMBER TO DO SO!

He said he was just trying to test me. WTF he thinks i am? a lab rat? He's just trying to make me angry and CONGRATS,he did it!

I told him I can forget people easily,LETS TRY THAT ON HIM,SHALL WE?

U FKCER I CAN LIVE WITHOUT YOU. TOLD YOU NOT TO GET ON MY NERVES!

I'VE GOT TAGGED.

Aaron my dearest ex housie has tagged me. okay, 5 obssession issit?
in random order,

1. Dawn- I'm not revealing his name due to some circumstances(his ex girlfriend who is attached to somebody I know).He's by far,the most amazing person I know,I cant even tell you
how I fell for him and when did I fall for him because I just dont have the answer. He's
everything to me and he is a beautiful person.A little annoying and a pain in the ass,
but i love him anyways.

2. Nail polish - Those who knows me well know this.I am sickly addicted with nail polish. I have
wide range of nail polishes at all shades and some are already expired,had to
throw them away. I can count days I've had without nail polish on my nails.

3. my mobile - I go everywhere with it.EVERYWHERE.

4. BARIO - i go there EVERY chance i get and when i'm there,I just refused to go back to Miri.
I talk about bario highly as if its heaven and I talk about bario to everyone I know.
Now all my malaya friends wana go to Bario. I am just a proud Kelabit from Bario.

5. Self-destruction - knowing myself for almost 20 years,and looking back at my past, as
pathetic as it sounds,yes,i am self destructive. Done.

I'll tag Aysha, Karen, Aida, Meck and Izza.

HEY YOU GUYS ARE TAGGED!

TODAY!

today,17th of April 2007, i feel like I am in love with him all over again.Its like i just knew him last night and his last message means so much to me,and I felt asleep with the happy thoughts of him and I together.It is not those 3 words-those 3 words that are often said, but a line of amazing awesome beautiful words that will always be close to my heart.

Despite the distance,for once,i felt the overwhelming feelings that we both share,and for once,I felt totally loved by my adorable Mr.Dawn.

I know,tomorrows might have heartbreaks,but I will always remember today,when I woke up and knowing that you are mine.

Mr.Dawn, thanks for being patient all this while.Thanks for being patient with my horrible mood swings. Thanks for every smile you put on my face.Thanks for those addictive laughs that inspire mine.Thanks for each tears and heartbreaks,for those are what that makes me realise how important you are to me.. Thanks for trusting me,despite your trust issue.Thanks for allowing yourself to believe in me,and believe in us whenever I lose faith. Thanks for everything.Thanks for being you.

heart you,infinity.